Tree rings.

Being an Asian American woman on staff shapes my leadership and interactions with students on campus.  And as an Asian American on staff with InterVarsity, I have the unique opportunity to be a part of the Asian American Ministries (AAM) - a segment of InterVarsity's ministry and organization that seeks to reach more Asian American students with the gospel and empower them to become industry leaders and culture-shapers for the kingdom.  

Every 3 years, AAM hosts a conference for staff who are Asian American and/or serve Asian American chapters or chapters that are predominantly Asian American students.  I've only been to one other AAM staff conference, but I've learned that this conference holds value for these AAM staff in many different ways.   For some, it's a helpful context to gain vision and tools for reaching Asian American students.  For others, it's a helpful just to be among a community - a family - of people who understand your culture, your work, and how those tend to intersect.  And for others, it does both.

For me, I find the conference to be a helpful space and community to help me further explore my ethnic identity with Jesus and how this ethnic identity affects my staff work and my life in general.  I've found that there a lot to learn from the ways I do connect and the ways I don't connect with my fellow colleagues, but it is very much like family - you many not know each other well, you may not connect over everything, but we care about each other and challenge each other to grow.

This year's theme was called, "Flourish," to help us as staff expand our reach and extend our influence.  There are many things I could share from this conference, but if I could only choose one, it is this:  an invitation I sensed from the Lord was to consider how I could reach and empower the Asian American students all over the upstate part of NY to flourish.  I am currently the only Asian American woman InterVarsity staff in upstate NY, and while I don't feel like I have a ton of experience, wisdom, or influence right now, I firmly believe that just being on staff can be a huge beginning factor.  God can use my five loaves and two fish to multiply His work.  

A photo posted by Tammy B. (@tammyoncampus) on Mar 4, 2016 at 2:22pm PST

Now, as for what this would all look like, I have no idea.  But the Lord is with me, and I am confident in Him.

Embracing my Asian American background

"The nail that sticks out gets hammered down."

This Japanese expression characterizes the attitude of many Asian Americans.  We should not put ourselves forward and stick out.  Many of us aren't sure whether we can or should lead.  And the Western models of leadership don't seem to fit.

This was taken from the back cover of Paul Tokunaga's book, Invitation to Lead:  Guidance for Emerging Asian American Leaders.  I read this book earlier this year and just finished reading, Following Jesus Without Dishonoring Your Parents, written by Jeanette Yep, Peter Cha, Susan Cho Van Riesen, Greg Jao & Paul Tokunaga.  Both are excellent reads and I highly recommend them!

As I dive into ministry work and transition through post-graduate life, the Asian American aspect of my identity has begun to surface in ways I hadn't anticipated.  Growing up as an American-Born Chinese (ABC) in an Asian American Christian community is a huge part of my identity, but I haven't really faced the large-scale implications and impact that Asian Americans may have as a cultural group until I started college.

Throughout my life I more often than not saw myself as very American because I didn't seem to have your typical Asian parents compared to most other Asian Americans I encountered or heard about.  So I didn't really understand what it meant to embrace my Asian American culture.  But recently I've begun to see that perhaps a number of the conflicts or struggles I've experienced throughout my life were rooted in a tension between these two worlds.  

Paul Tokunaga identifies it this way in Invitation to Lead:

Philip Slater, in The Pursuit of Loneliness, states that America stresses competition, individualism, independence and technology.  Asian cultures, on the other hand, tend to stress cooperation, community, interdependence and tradition.  "The cultures pull in opposite directions, and it is the soul of the Asian American that provides the rope for the tug of war."

Being partly in two worlds but not fully in either makes for a difficult high-wire balancing act.  What makes it so tough is that Asian and Western values are often polar opposites.  


It's true.  I feel like I fall closer towards the Western end of the Asian spectrum and closer towards the Asian end of the Western spectrum, and it's just confusing sometimes trying to figure out how to deal with certain issues or conflicts that arise.  

Susan Cho Van Riesen, though, makes an important point:

The key to wise discernment begins with knowing what kingdom values are first, and then listening well to our parents for wisdom and reflections of the kingdom in what they are saying.

I don't think this applies just to our parents but with any relationship we may encounter.  And I'm recognizing the importance of embracing my Asian heritage, while identifying areas where being an Asian American needs redemption and how Asian American values may have gifts to contribute to the body of Christ as well.

All in all, it's a vital part of growing as a leader and understanding what kind of impact my cultural background has/will have.  I know my journey as an Asian American leader doesn't stop here - it's just beginning to bud - and it won't be an easy or smooth road, but it's worth it to see how God will let it bloom.

An excerpt from Tokunaga's epilogue:

The biggest challenge for the next generation of Asian American leaders is to be one.

It will be far easier to be that nail that stays hammered down.  Leadership is risky, costly, dangerous and complex.  It can be nerve-wracking, faith-shaking and seductive.  It can drive you crazy.

You can say no.  Many potentially pretty good leaders do.  They just walk away and go about their business.  When they do that, however, there are three losers:  themselves, the lives that could have been affected by their leadership and then their followers.

Of the three, you lose the most.  Being a leader stretches us to our limits and beyond.  It forces us to trust God like never before.  We live out faith in once invisible dimensions of our lives.  We end up leading and serving some people we used to dislike even despise.  We might even end up loving them.  

But others lose too.  You have things to give that others need; stuff you weren't even aware was yours to offer.  Be that stick-out nail.


What kind of insight or experiences have you gained as an Asian American or as someone who has worked with/encountered Asian Americans?